Seniors who want to grow old at home may refuse simple assistance or living conditions that are unacceptable despite being designed to provide them compassionate home care in Austin. So how do you handle the problem posed by a stubborn senior who is living in your home but does not want to listen to advice or instructions that are intended to promote their well-being?
It’s an obstacle that comes more often than you might imagine and navigating through this tough time requires some patience, understanding, and acceptance (with just a little negotiation and maybe some easy persuasion):
Understand the Issue and Accepting It Anyway
The bottom line is this, they are your parents and they have the right to make their own choices. Good or bad. Don’t beat yourself up over their insistence and refusal to do what it is you want them to do or to accept in their living situation. Taking it personally or assuming too much of the responsibility for their reluctance can weigh heavily on you and your own well-being.
So, take it easy, understand why they do or do not want something in their life and accept it. But that doesn’t mean you can’t still persist.
Choose Your Battles Carefully
Sometimes an issue only becomes an issue when you or your senior make it into one. Arguments and conflicts can arise from the smallest things and these disagreements can spill over into other matters and situations in your lives. In addition, constant reminders and nagging about a senior’s behavior or lack thereof on a certain matter can also make them less inclined to want to comply with your wishes.
Think long and hard about whether or not this current concern is really something that needs to be addressed with such urgency. If it’s no big deal, save your worries for another issue that might warrant instead.
Ask on Behalf of Yourself or Others
Asking your senior do or accept something as a favor to you or even their grandchildren can be a powerful request. See if they will honor it as a way to make you and the grandkids feel better about the senior’s health and well-being. Phrasing this as something that will make you or your kids happy can be an effective way to make your senior think twice about their decision.
Remember, Don’t Internalize
You can only do so much. Going above and beyond the call of duty is a given whenever something concerns your parents’ health and safety. But regardless of your requests to the contrary, if your senior goes ahead and does (or does not) proceed against your wishes, there is nothing you can really do about it at the end of the day.
No matter what happens as a result, don’t internalize your feelings and blame yourself. Just be there if and when your senior needs you to step in should something go wrong. As long as you are doing everything within your power to try to persuade them to act in their own best interests you’ve done all you can.